by John
Jun 1, 2005 08:11
Women see really inane things as symbolic milestones in a relationship.
“Oh, this is a picture from our five-year anniversary!”
“Oh, this is first time he touched my cheek. I traced his hand with a runny marker and then face-planted onto a piece of white paper to create a stamp.”
“Oh, this is my wedding ring.”
Whatever. Hogwash, nonsense, and balderdash. Let’s talk about a real milestone. The moment when I can turn to you and say, “Hey, can you take a look at this thing on my back?”
Yes, I will allow you to peer at my shirtless back. Not for wont or pleasure, but for a medical purpose. Yes, my back, which one day will be covered in a fine Mediterranean coat, is ready for your diagnosis. Feel free to put on your spectacles for a more detailed inspection.
And thanks; I do work out.
Take a good look at my skin aberration – be it pimple, boil, or imbedded tick – and enjoy the surrounding skin area. This is a momentous occasion. One day, what you see will be doughy, bespeckled, and obscured by fleece. So drink in the exotic scenery and treasure this milestone.