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Alright gather 'round children...

by Paul Aug 7, 2006 10:29

Uncle Paul is about to tell you all a story, without molesting anybody in the process. The title of this story is "The Worst Story Ever." Now don't let the title mislead you, this is the best story ever.

Basically a long long long long time ago, before the wind; before the snow. Lived a man, lived a man I know. Lived a freak of nature named Sir Psycho.

That being said, my story has nothing to do with Sir Psycho. My story is about a car ride in the middle of a winter night.

A close associate of mine was transporting me from one domicile to mine. The length of this trip in subjective distance is 3 blocks. The time span door-to-door is about two minutes.

Now on this fateful night, I sat in the car with my associate, and proceded to improvise a song. My associate even joined in, offering both harmony and chorus, along with unique verse as well. The lyrics were silky smooth. The melody oh-so right. Even the cadence and depth of the subject matter was amazing. None of the song was preconceived; all of it was grammy ready.

Upon arrival at my house, my associate and I completed our chart topping single, and nodded at each other in approval of how amazingly off the hinges we are with our song singing skillz.

Have you ever had one of those moments where something really awesome happens, and then it takes a split second after that feeling of awesomeness to actually appreciate the scale of what just occurred? That happens to me every time I have a thought. That happened to me when I bit it riding a moped. That happened to me when I jumped out of that second story window. That happened to me when I drove an ATV off a 30 foot sand dune, ultimately resulting in Mexican stitches. That ALSO happened to me after we finished the song. Now, it was sinking in that this song was so awesome, that I would be hard pressed to ever improvise a song of equal, let alone superior, quality.

The song is so good, that I tell people this story all the time.
With that in mind, I can't remember a single lyric of the entire thing; and THAT, ladies, is why this is the Worst Story Ever Told.

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